Cancer Love and Romance Overview
Those who fall in love with Cancer sometimes feel as though they are between a rock and a hard place. Yes, Cancer is full of loving emotion but the other extreme is dealing with those changing moods, the sometimes self-doubting emotions that undermine some of the Cancerian’s most noble personality traits.
On the one hand people feel drawn to you, Cancer, but you must take full control of your feelings and not sabotage the relationship by superimposing your fears and apprehensions on those you care for most. You are hypersensitive and therefore anything that is said is often magnified beyond its realistic value. Try to listen with your head as well as your heart and don’t exaggerate what you feel are slights by other people.
Part of the issue here is that casual affairs are not for you. You’re the sort of person who looks to the long term and wants to give yourself fully in commitment to the one you love. In return, you expect 100% as well. Now these days it’s not that easy to get the commitment you’re looking for and this could rub you up the wrong way, especially earlier on in the piece when you’re looking to get that commitment from another.
Slow and steady wins the race and patience for the Cancer born is the supreme virtue in matters of love. You are intense and loyal in your affections and it may not be easy to find your soul mate in this world, which is why I say to you that you need to play the waiting game for the right person to come along. If you settle for second best your feelings of insecurity will surface and this will undermine the relationship.
In respect of finding and staying with your true soul mate, you should always rely on your powerful, intuitive feelings which, with the water signs such as yours, are fully developed. If you try to second-guess yourself you’ll slip up. Your first impressions are probably correct so rely on these feelings to make your choices in life and you’ll more than likely find yourself in the right sort of situation with the right sort of person.
This intuitive streak that you possess can be a little unnerving to others, however. You know precisely when someone is not being straight with you. But you mustn’t have your FBI magnifying glass turned on all the time. Your prospective lovers may feel as though they’re being constantly interrogated.
On a lighter note, your imagination and honesty provide your partners a wonderful blend of social and emotional interaction. You bring this to your most intimate moments and therefore your physical and sexual expressions are rich and full of genuine affection. It’s difficult to find that in relationships these days, which is why it may be a little too much for your partner when they first experience the full force of your love. What I’m saying, Cancer, is that you may need to dilute it just a little until they acclimatize themselves to your perfect form of love.
As mentioned earlier, your moods are probably your most difficult point of contention. Your lovers and spouses will be constantly treading on eggshells trying to get a handle on how to deal with you. You are extremely changeable and although this is a challenge for your soul mates, it makes life so much more interesting for them and for you. But might I suggest that you don’t simply hang onto these fluctuating emotions for the sake of creating interest in your partners. You must rise above these feelings and claim your birthright as an evolved Cancerian who is able to move into a selfless and unconditional form of love.
Controlling these feelings will be one of your life’s biggest challenges. Once you are able to do so, your loyal faithfulness will be received fully and with a reciprocal love that will bring joy and deep fulfillment to you. Love, emotional nourishment and a happy family life are the motivating factors which drive the Cancerian personality. Taking control of your inner life will ensure that you reach your goal and live this fulfilling, romantic life.
It’s hard for any of us to deny that love, emotion and warmth of feeling are the foundation of loving and enduring relationships. And Cancer-born individuals are governed so strongly by this sense of feeling and emotion that they are natural lovers, through and through. You will relate completely to what I’m saying, Cancer, when I refer to the fact that as an emotional star sign you have a view that love is forever.
You don’t function well when your emotions are disconnected from the physical act of love. I speak here particularly of sexuality. In that respect, sex for you without an outpouring of feeling is a dried and mechanical experience that in no way attracts you at all.
But there are some problems entertaining the idealistic level of love that you aspire to. What are they, you ask?
Penetrating your hard exterior is difficult for others and those who are impatient may not take the time to work through that. Of course, you need to protect yourself and test those who would suggest they want to give it a go with you in a romantic way. But you are not that easy and want to test the waters of love significantly before giving your heart to someone unconditionally. That’s the problem. You mustn’t be shy at coming forward to let a prospective lover know that this is your way. At least if they understand where you’re coming from, they may be happy to extend their patience because what is achieved once they do win your heart is very, very special.
As I said, it’s an instinctive thing for you to love, and once an individual is chosen by you, they are regarded as special, are pampered, nourished and mothered in every way possible. In fact, the Cancer lover is in many ways the ideal lover. Part of your requirement in love is that you find someone who not only satisfies your emotional and physical needs, but your practical and family needs as well. You want to know that your partner will step up to the plate, take the challenge and share the load of family life, making a nest and growing a family. You very much admire a partner who, like yourself, values the traditional concept of family and the associated roles of parenthood.
It’s very important that you pay close attention to what I’m about to say now, Cancer, for this may have an important bearing upon your future happiness in your relationships. And it is this: please try to find a high degree of security within yourself before making that all-important commitment in love. If you’re not able to feel secure in yourself, self-empowered by your own inner beauty and capacity in life, you may become insecure and demanding, expecting your partner to fulfil those things in yourself that you’ve never been able to achieve as an individual.
Once you gain control over the inner world of your emotions, you’ll become the master of your destiny and will be in the best position of all to enjoy the state of romance and love.
Unfortunately, some Cancerians attract partners who are cold, aloof and distant. Think hard about the type of person with whom you want to spend your life. If they’re not a major-league hugger and kisser, you’re going to get frustrated. It’s okay to trust your intuition in this area, but don’t be afraid to use some good old brainpower, too.
If you love someone but they don’t love you back, you may go into a sullen and introverted spiralling dive. You are quick to feel hurt, and sometimes you put your emotions in a sealed container and let them heat up to boiling point. Your lover will not know what is wrong, of course—they’re not psychic! And this infuriates you even more. This is not a good cycle to get into.
The solution is to say how you feel before it gets on top of you. The lunar cycle will affect your mind and relationships, so learn to tune in to your cycles. Once you recognise the signals you’ll be able to handle what’s happening better, and share your feelings with your loved ones.
In so many cases I see this happening to you, Cancer, and this will become a key issue in your marriage or long-term relationships if you don’t heed my advice. When your insecurities become overpowering, you’ll find your moods dominating the relationship landscape, causing you to sulk, to retreat into yourself and to punish your partner with the silent treatment. You may use communication and/or silence as a treat or punishment tool. Your partner may put up with this for some time but in the end they will walk.
Taking a more spiritual view, remembering that your mind and your emotions are your slaves and not your masters is the secret key for you in finding happiness in your relationships and not being pulled here, there and everywhere by changeable inner states.